Christmas was very mellow. I didn't get many gifts because I'm moving and also have no particular needs. The big things I want, like a new computer, are things I'll be getting out in California. My mom bought me some earrings and a pair of pajamas, my dad got me two DVDs, and my brother just gave me a $100 bill. I got my mom two Ina Garten cookbooks (she loves her) and some socks. I got my dad a DVD and a desktop Titantic gag gift for work. And then I got my brother a track jacket and four polos from work. He actually wore the jacket and said it would be really useful, and then he said he'd actually wear the bright pink and orange polos (I hadn't been sure). So I think I did pretty well with my shopping.

Weight? Well, I've gained since my low day of 161.8. But I guess that's not surprising given I lost the recent lbs soooo ridiculously quickly. It was bound to be partially a water retention issue. I still weigh about 3 lbs less than I did last Thursday (when I was 167.6), and I also got my period today and I always gain bloat weight at the beginning, so I'm not too upset. I was surprisingly hungry today and ate a lot at Christmas dinner, and then I've been picking at fruit chocolates and I probably had too much dessert at my aunt's house. Oh well. Back to the meal plans tomorrow, when I work 8-4 and will probably have an awful day of doing returns. And since we had so many sales, people are going to be all upset when they only get a $7.00 store credit and stuff.

I'm off Saturday. I work Sunday and then my last day is Wednesday. Only three more shifts! I can make it! =)

This is Friends Only. Couldn't remember if I'd ever posted a public entry...

I've lost 10 lbs so far this summer. And I bought new pants which are a little bit too tight as incentive to lose more. I haven't been dieting. This is 10 lbs of pure beer weight. And maybe slightly more exercise. I'm going back to California to visit some friends for a birthday next Thursday. Hopefully I'll be able to lose another 5 lbs this week, and then keep it off for the party.

I've lost 10 pounds since coming home! I am very happy and excited about it. I'm hoping to lose at least 10 more by July 19th, when I fly back to California to visit for a friend's birthday. I want to look extra good. Since I've been away for a few months, the weight loss should be obvious.

Back home in lovely New Jersey. I've been home for almost a week and now that I've gotten school out of my system, it's diet and exercise time! Hopefully I'll be able to stay motivated throughout the summer. Also, I don't do any smoking or drinking when I'm home (just feels weird), which will probably help a lot.

I started taking Xenadrine EFX a few days ago. It seems to be working. The scale is registering 1-3 lbs lower, at any rate, and I haven't felt like eating. I'm not sure if its a placebo effect or that the pills are actually appetite surpressants. Side effects are annoying. I'm really focused and kind of jittery, but it's been getting better.

Not in a good mood, but I wanted to update and let everyone know I'm alive and more or less well.

So I'm doing a fast tomorrow. I'll allow myself diet coke and water. That's it. No solids and no juices. Technically I'm starting at midnight, but I have eaten since dinner around 6:30PM. This will be a pretty long fast, so I might extend it to 48 hours since I'm already going over 24 hours to begin with. It may not be possible for me to go 48 hours without some of my friends noticing though.

I'm dying my hair blonde in the near future. A lot of my friends are pretty excited to see the difference. I have very dark brown hair. I've had it highlighted with various shades of red and caramel, but I've never colored it completely. And it's never been significantly lighter than the natural shade. My family will mock me endlessly when I go home. Sometimes I am asked whether I am mixed or what my "nationality" is (for the curious: French, Italian, German, English, Scotts-Irish). I wonder if dying my hair blonde will end the questions.

I ate so badly today! Let's just say a corndog was involved... Oh well. At least it was a sexual food. Maybe the humor was worth it.

Feeling alternatively fat and not fat. I'm both tired and stressed right now, which leaves me torn between going to the gym or sitting on my ass wasting time at the computer. I'm also fighting the urge to purge (I like that phrase because it ryhmes) my dinner. Eating the sexual corndog has it's share of associated guilt.

Trying hard right now to find some art projects I can work on-- those always make me feel better. But I don't think I'll have anything to work on until the weekend at best. So that leaves reading for classes or the gym. Luckily I have bowling tonight, which is fun and prevents me from self-destructive tendencies. I bowl with three of my friends for intramural sports. We alternate who has to drive... I have to admit it is more amusing when 3 out of the 4 of us are drunk.

I hate being bulimic, but then I'm not sure that 100% of me wants to get better right now. And I don't think I can really "completely" recover until I'm entirely committed. And I don't know when I'm going to hit that stage.

I'm now back at school. It's nice coming back after a break. It'll probably take me about a week to get my Senioritis back (which is really annoying given I'm a Junior). I have a lot of loose ends with student government stuff I need to finish, but I don't have much work for my classes.

I really want to improve my art and animation skills. I think my dream job would be working for Pixar. I'm so out of practice though. But hey, I can do Abstract Algebra. Fantastically useful. I guess it's never bad to have a math degree. And I really like Operations Research and my Graph Theory class. I'm just so looking forward to graduating and going to art school instead.

I saw 300 with my friend the other day. And all I could think was "I wish I were so in shape!" Action movies usually motivate me to work out so that, hypothetically, in some ancient society or post-apocalyptic world I could kick ass and look damn good doing it. I mean, if you're going to fight the Persians or kill zombies you might as well have a six pack.

Not feeling too fat right now. This is a pleasant surprise.

I have some awkward boy-situations. I'm just not interested right now. I've got a lot on my mind, and it would take some ridiculous hotness and Eddie Izzard level hilarity to win me over. Which is kind of ironic given I'm not exactly supermodel material.

So it's my last day in Islamorada with my family. Tomorrow will be an all-day airport-day for the flights back to California. I'll be getting back around 10:45PM. Which, I might add, was a bit of a nightmare because nearly everybody was planning to be drunk. Took me forever to find a ride.

Some friends of mine are throwing a moustache party, so I have to make one at the airport. Drawing one on is cheating, so girls are forced to be more creative.

We got take out from Outback for dinner today. I got a Queensland salad. I puked the whole thing after my 30 min faux-workout in the shitty exercise room. Besides that, I had eaten a bagel and biscuit for breakfast. I also had some of the bloomin' onion post-puking. I'm tempted to purge again. I've had to do it in the shower so my family won't notice.